Back in 2021, I was tapped to be a judge for one of the strangest festivals I’ve ever been asked to participate in. It was going to be called Chowdermeister, and it all started when my Twitter buddy, Jake Browne, polled Twitter to see what the worst food and drink pairing could possibly be.
People overwhelmingly picked chowder and Jägermeister (which was a suggestion by my friend Josh Scherer, host of YouTube channel Mythical Kitchen). Originally Jägermeister agreed to sponsor the fest, but later pulled out, because the brand I strictly associate with binge drinking didn’t care for the unflattering attention the drink was getting. The festival was subsequently canceled and I never got to experience this potentially gag-inducing combination of food and beverage.
But I’ve been thinking about that question again recently. Since I never got to try the combo of chowder and Jägermeister, I wondered if that truly was the worst pairing ever. I’m not sure I’m entirely convinced. Clowns, there’s got to be some other good contenders out there.
So what do you all think is the worst food and drink pairing?
I bet you’ve got some pretty good picks. I’ll pick some of my favorites and try them out for the next edition of the newsletter.
These answers are cracking me up. First of all, who knew you guys wanted me to drink Listerine so badly, and second of all, you're all obsessed with clam juice. I love it and I love you. I'm trying to ride out this difficult week, so I'll likely write about this next week. You're the best.
there's this one tumblr post where someone tries to neutralize spice (i forgot what exactly? tabasco?) with mintiness (straight listerine). however, the capsaicin receptors in your mouth are activated separately from menthol ones, so what you get, instead of a cancelling out effect, is concentrated pain (one reply referred to it as hellfire). so i nominate tabasco and listerine, but in case it has to be a solid food/liquid drink combo specifically made for consumption, then i guess a shamrock shake and any dish made with the spiciest peppers you can find will do.
the problem with that is the reason dairy soothes capsaicin is because the molecule is soluble in fats. this also means (nonpolar dissolves nonpolar) that capsaicin is soluble in alcohol. so maybe just really minty water.
I also remember reading when I was a preteen that Daniel Johns from Silverchair had had a band called “warm fish milkshake” because it was the grossest thing he could think of. It still makes me gag a bit and I’d love to see you try one.
For completely off the wall: toum and tuna tea sandwiches (because fancy) with hot mulled rosé (because the weather can’t decide if it’s warm or cold and that’s timely and topical).
For regular things that should never be combined: oysters rockefeller and monster nitro (room temperature). Per monster’s site it is: “citrus with a light & dry texture similar to fine champagne”
A “Long Island iced tea” mixed with a thimble each of Goldschlagger, earl grey tea, whiskey, Gatorade, whole milk and top with Cocoa Puffs. All over macerated ice. Paired with a couple of Swedish licorice.
Homemade horseradish vodka and cheap sugar free gummy candy. First, you've got the horse commonality (gelatin in the candy, horse in the radish). Then, the combination of the insipid sweetness of the gummy candy with the nasal bite of the drink. Finally, you get the artificial sugar shits and get to smell it all again.
Warm milk mixed with a shot of blackstrap molasses and another shot of flavored vinegar (for a nice warm, slightly sweet, slightly bitter curdled beverage) as the drink and a pate terrine of hakarl, Limburger, preserved lemon and Flamin’ Hot Cheetos as the main. Bon appétit!
Sambuca paired with very spicy tacos, preferably in a wheat (soft) tortilla, and preferably a tacos de lengua. Or a flautas, but I'm not sure about the deep frying. Might actually make the thing palatable.
These answers are cracking me up. First of all, who knew you guys wanted me to drink Listerine so badly, and second of all, you're all obsessed with clam juice. I love it and I love you. I'm trying to ride out this difficult week, so I'll likely write about this next week. You're the best.
Ceviche with a nice hot mug of egg nog
Oh fuck, I am laughing my ass off
This wins
This is evil and I love it. Please do not make me try it.
Grapefruit juice and York Peppermint Patties.
I was gonna say a chocolate mint brownie and oj lol
I keep also thinking of OJ and beef jerky.
Clam juice sucked through a Tim Tam biscuit.
May I go further and suggest an Oreo soaked in clam juice?
TIM TAM SLAM (diarrhea edition).
Tim Tam Clam Slam
Oh, the modified Imbruglia! Evil! Make it a mint TimTam, maybe? https://youtu.be/5wTWQLqLFcY
there's this one tumblr post where someone tries to neutralize spice (i forgot what exactly? tabasco?) with mintiness (straight listerine). however, the capsaicin receptors in your mouth are activated separately from menthol ones, so what you get, instead of a cancelling out effect, is concentrated pain (one reply referred to it as hellfire). so i nominate tabasco and listerine, but in case it has to be a solid food/liquid drink combo specifically made for consumption, then i guess a shamrock shake and any dish made with the spiciest peppers you can find will do.
Ooo but shamrock shake has the dairy that will soothe capsaicin....
Mint julep and something very spicy
the problem with that is the reason dairy soothes capsaicin is because the molecule is soluble in fats. this also means (nonpolar dissolves nonpolar) that capsaicin is soluble in alcohol. so maybe just really minty water.
wow i sound like a dick in this comment. sorry. got too excited about boring shit.
It's just science! The science of cruelty
Paqui one chip challenge chip and mint tea kombucha?
Why not make a shake using Listerine?
does dennis's sodastream still work? because i remember soda stinging like a bitch when eating spicy stuff. CARBONATED LISTERINE AND HOT WINGS
It 100% died after the carbonated sashimi experiment
we were so close to having it all
That sounds AMAZING!!!
Malort and circus peanuts
I also remember reading when I was a preteen that Daniel Johns from Silverchair had had a band called “warm fish milkshake” because it was the grossest thing he could think of. It still makes me gag a bit and I’d love to see you try one.
https://youtu.be/2HKTx5WFcs0
Hawaiian Punch and SpaghettiOs with Meatballs. Had a run in with this combo when I was a kid and it's never left me.
Mint julep and plain yogurt.
For completely off the wall: toum and tuna tea sandwiches (because fancy) with hot mulled rosé (because the weather can’t decide if it’s warm or cold and that’s timely and topical).
For regular things that should never be combined: oysters rockefeller and monster nitro (room temperature). Per monster’s site it is: “citrus with a light & dry texture similar to fine champagne”
OH OKAY. Let’s get in that boat.
Smoked salmon and strawberry milk
Chargrilled branzino topped with Duncan Hines frosting and sprinkles.
Clam Juice and superman ice cream.
Oh my GOD. I almost reported this comment
This made me shudder.
A “Long Island iced tea” mixed with a thimble each of Goldschlagger, earl grey tea, whiskey, Gatorade, whole milk and top with Cocoa Puffs. All over macerated ice. Paired with a couple of Swedish licorice.
Listerine and anything
Gefilte fish and fernet branca.
Wait. Creamed pickled herring and fernet branca.
Gummy worms as the food, mayonnaise as the drink
probably makin grits with faygo
Shrimp bisque and hot chocolate. Both as thick, creamy, and heavy as possible.
Homemade horseradish vodka and cheap sugar free gummy candy. First, you've got the horse commonality (gelatin in the candy, horse in the radish). Then, the combination of the insipid sweetness of the gummy candy with the nasal bite of the drink. Finally, you get the artificial sugar shits and get to smell it all again.
Hot clam chowder and orange juice. Bonus if, when you mix it, it’s also curdled before you eat it.
orange juice and lasagna
I remember this combo from childhood as being absolutely disgusting and haven't tried it since.
Ooh! A super dry, tanniny wine and an over-cooked, unseasoned poached chicken breast.
You know what? Scratch the wine, and sub in one of those paper cones of room-temp tap water.
Aw this just gave me depression
He keeps saying he wants to try to make the blandest food possible!
Love this
i have limited food and drink experience but im thinking mouthwash (just a sip - safety first) and grilled cheese. Love your newsletter :]
Starbucks French roast and grapefruit. Or, kava and something with Szechuan peppercorns.
Strong homemade Kimchi and rakia (Croatian brandy that makes malört look appetizing)
Pei Pa Koa (Chinese herbal cough syrup) and funfetti cupcakes
Malort Banana Jello or Oreos dipped in St. Elmo Cocktail Sauce
Can't say for the worst, I've been surprised in the past.
On the contrary, Pastis works pretty well with everything, surprisingly.
sweet ice tea, the southern stuff that has to be heated to get enough sugar in it and pixy sticks.
It will be edible, but you will feel like hell from the sugar.
Shit, we eat that for breakfast in West Virginia. Well.. make the tea mountain dew and the pixy sticks meth, and you're a mountaineer!
That does explain some things about West Virginia.
Sweeten the tea with the Pixy Stix in place of sugar, then pair with Rocky Mountain oysters or century eggs.
Any combination of Dr. Who food: say, fish sticks plus rice pudding and red wine
Hakarl and Malort
Ouzo with cheesey-mayo baked mussels on the half shell
Surströmming and Malort. Or Surströmming with anything really.
How about sauerkraut and pastry stout. It even rhymes.
Chocolate and orange
Cranberry cocktail and a chili cheese stuffed baked potato
Mountain Dew and crème brûlée
Please don’t drink Listerine, I wanna keep reading your stuff.
I recently had Chocolate with Coriander, freaking delicious!
So maybe try a steak taco, cilantro and onion style, with a Yoohoo. It sounds pretty awful but interesting!
So you're not the only one who noticed all the Listerine suggestions!
- Mexican hot chocolate and salt and vinegar kettle chips
- Makegeolli and pop rocks
- Ovaltine and uni
Warm milk mixed with a shot of blackstrap molasses and another shot of flavored vinegar (for a nice warm, slightly sweet, slightly bitter curdled beverage) as the drink and a pate terrine of hakarl, Limburger, preserved lemon and Flamin’ Hot Cheetos as the main. Bon appétit!
cough syrup in place of the cheese in a Minnesota style 'Juicy Lucy"
Sunny D and sparkling red wine mimosas with canned cheeseburgers topped with that spray blue cheese dressing you hate.
Natty Daddy and Belly Jellys
Kool-Aid Sharkleberry Fin and Balut
Sambuca paired with very spicy tacos, preferably in a wheat (soft) tortilla, and preferably a tacos de lengua. Or a flautas, but I'm not sure about the deep frying. Might actually make the thing palatable.
Mavrodaphne and fried clams
Hot chocolate and sushi with lots of wasabi
How bout eggnog and sushi?
Not sure if this qualifies, but a local dive I used to frequent once had a Spam Cookoff. The winning "recipe" was a Spamshake: Spam and milk.
I don’t know what to pair it with, but a super salty and lemony drink with peeled grapes inside to represent your poor eyeballs?