Maybe soak a piece or two in tequila and taste it again in a week? I actually made a fruitcake the other day, thinking about Aunt Judith’s Rasputinesque monstrosity. In her honor, I added chocolate chunks, but I wanted it edible so I followed the baking instructions to the letter. It’s now absorbing a shit-ton of Haitian rum. However, Judith’s spirit seems to be following me around; last night at the restaurant, one of the line cooks accidentally cranked the oven temp all the way up while the baker’s key lime pies were in there. They came out blackened on every surface. The custard had Grand Canyon-deep fissures and they were clearly unsalvageable. My cousin, one of the managers, thought it was pizza and cut himself a slice while they were still screaming hot. The screwed-up, dismayed face he made while being assaulted by the taste and texture of wildly overcooked key lime pie, while expecting something savory, is what I imagine to be the look worn by uptight Bon Apetit readers seeing your insta handle. I tried a little spoonful later, after they had cooled and right before they all got trashed. The taste was fine, but the texture - grainy and sticky and tooth-coating - awful! It was a good laugh, though.
You're gonna need a bigger apartment or at least a storage unit to fit all those Jimmy Beard awards. Tho I suppose with being picked up by Boner Appetit mag, you can buy a house now. Seriously, tho, congrats Dickhole. Off topic, Fifth Third bank has an option to change what they call me when I sign in online. David sounds so boring so now they greet me as Asshat (so do the ATMs).
I just assumed it was a family name, descended from RichardholeDannis.
Your ideas continue to inject me with terror in the best way. Like if Christmas morning had an evil twin.
Maybe soak a piece or two in tequila and taste it again in a week? I actually made a fruitcake the other day, thinking about Aunt Judith’s Rasputinesque monstrosity. In her honor, I added chocolate chunks, but I wanted it edible so I followed the baking instructions to the letter. It’s now absorbing a shit-ton of Haitian rum. However, Judith’s spirit seems to be following me around; last night at the restaurant, one of the line cooks accidentally cranked the oven temp all the way up while the baker’s key lime pies were in there. They came out blackened on every surface. The custard had Grand Canyon-deep fissures and they were clearly unsalvageable. My cousin, one of the managers, thought it was pizza and cut himself a slice while they were still screaming hot. The screwed-up, dismayed face he made while being assaulted by the taste and texture of wildly overcooked key lime pie, while expecting something savory, is what I imagine to be the look worn by uptight Bon Apetit readers seeing your insta handle. I tried a little spoonful later, after they had cooled and right before they all got trashed. The taste was fine, but the texture - grainy and sticky and tooth-coating - awful! It was a good laugh, though.
I am a little surprised that you didn't know about spice cake mix, @dickholedannis, it is one of the key ingredients in tomato soup cake after all https://clickamericana.com/wp-content/uploads/Vintage-tomato-soup-cake-Quick-holiday-spice-cake-recipe-1965-3.jpg
... which come to think of it, tomato soup might make a nice addition to a vegetable cake
You're gonna need a bigger apartment or at least a storage unit to fit all those Jimmy Beard awards. Tho I suppose with being picked up by Boner Appetit mag, you can buy a house now. Seriously, tho, congrats Dickhole. Off topic, Fifth Third bank has an option to change what they call me when I sign in online. David sounds so boring so now they greet me as Asshat (so do the ATMs).
I'm not even going to try to imagine what that tastes like. Just looking at it was bad enough.
The trick to a traditional vegetablecake is to soak the veggies in brandy before adding them ;)