“Dennis is like ‘Weird Al’ Yankovic,” says Kenji López-Alt
James Beard award? Pfft! That would be a step down from this compliment.
(people of the future, reading this entry on your synaptic interface: the Kenji quote is from the article about Dennis, linked at the top of this page)
#Bing#bong (can I safely say that to celebrate if I’m part Jew? Not wishing to offend.) Yum!! Could this be your most serious recipe yet? I don’t think I’ve yet seen you go on for 3 entire whole complete sentences without a truly disgusting I mean hilarious joke but you managed it here. Please never do it again. XO 🤡 (Amazing what a little notoriety can do! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 We are so proud.)
Ouch! These look like some of the worst tainted chicken I have seen. You know, the kind that you are afraid to smell. Three unnatural acts in one article.
Congrats on the write up, dude, you deserve to have more than enough subscribers to make a real go of this.
Chicken Cordon Bleu was always the highlight of military school meals. Most tables would be stuck with Chicken Kiev, but if you were one of the luck few who got served from the CB tray, it was a stroke of good fortune.
So yesterday, starting about 11:30 am, my power went out. It was out for 16 hours and it was 13 °F outside... After awhile I was tired of cold sandwiches, and started brainstorming. I looked at the candles-in-wine-bottles that I was using for light, and thought "Nah," I'd have to build a tower of some sort.
I then remembered the bag of tea candles I'd found in back of the remotest cupboard when I moved in. Over the years of cleaning and reorganizing I've encountered these candles a few times. Always wanted to throw them out, but I couldn't quite: "Nah, that's a burnable resource," I thought, and stuffed them back into the depths.
So it turns out that you can, in fact, make tea over a tea candle. It takes about 1.5 hours for one candle to get the water up to 180° in a ceramic cup. With that success under my belt, I then took a 9x13 baking pan and put 4 candles in the center. Placed a cooling rack over that. I found that I could get 6 oz water (in a fairly heavy but small pan) to simmer but not to boil. The rotini took about twice as long as normal to cook; I had them with butter and freshly grated parmesan.
After that I went wild. I mean, I was bored. So here are some other things you can "cook" with tea candles:
chicken bouillon
reheat pizza (requires foil tent)
cup noodles (again, 180°, so it required a longer soak)
re-warm coffee
fry a sausage patty (okay, more like render)
toast bread (was not evenly toasted, but still...)
As I was quaffing my bouillon, I wondered: what could the World's Greatest Food Writer do with tea candles? This is why I am writing to you, Dannis Ree, to ask: what could you do with tea candles?
“Dennis is like ‘Weird Al’ Yankovic,” says Kenji López-Alt
James Beard award? Pfft! That would be a step down from this compliment.
(people of the future, reading this entry on your synaptic interface: the Kenji quote is from the article about Dennis, linked at the top of this page)
In the Navy we called those pre-packaged cordon bleu's from the frozen section "hamsters."
In a manner of speaking, you just created the first gender-reveal hamster, you maniac.
#Bing#bong (can I safely say that to celebrate if I’m part Jew? Not wishing to offend.) Yum!! Could this be your most serious recipe yet? I don’t think I’ve yet seen you go on for 3 entire whole complete sentences without a truly disgusting I mean hilarious joke but you managed it here. Please never do it again. XO 🤡 (Amazing what a little notoriety can do! 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 We are so proud.)
That's awesome, Dannis! Good for you!
Brilliant work as usual, Dick Hole!
Nice burying of the lede...1/3 of the way down before you tell us that these aren't for Davida and you
Ouch! These look like some of the worst tainted chicken I have seen. You know, the kind that you are afraid to smell. Three unnatural acts in one article.
Alright, which one of us clowns is Helen Rosner?!
Congrats on the write up, dude, you deserve to have more than enough subscribers to make a real go of this.
Chicken Cordon Bleu was always the highlight of military school meals. Most tables would be stuck with Chicken Kiev, but if you were one of the luck few who got served from the CB tray, it was a stroke of good fortune.
Hey Dannis,
So yesterday, starting about 11:30 am, my power went out. It was out for 16 hours and it was 13 °F outside... After awhile I was tired of cold sandwiches, and started brainstorming. I looked at the candles-in-wine-bottles that I was using for light, and thought "Nah," I'd have to build a tower of some sort.
I then remembered the bag of tea candles I'd found in back of the remotest cupboard when I moved in. Over the years of cleaning and reorganizing I've encountered these candles a few times. Always wanted to throw them out, but I couldn't quite: "Nah, that's a burnable resource," I thought, and stuffed them back into the depths.
So it turns out that you can, in fact, make tea over a tea candle. It takes about 1.5 hours for one candle to get the water up to 180° in a ceramic cup. With that success under my belt, I then took a 9x13 baking pan and put 4 candles in the center. Placed a cooling rack over that. I found that I could get 6 oz water (in a fairly heavy but small pan) to simmer but not to boil. The rotini took about twice as long as normal to cook; I had them with butter and freshly grated parmesan.
After that I went wild. I mean, I was bored. So here are some other things you can "cook" with tea candles:
chicken bouillon
reheat pizza (requires foil tent)
cup noodles (again, 180°, so it required a longer soak)
re-warm coffee
fry a sausage patty (okay, more like render)
toast bread (was not evenly toasted, but still...)
As I was quaffing my bouillon, I wondered: what could the World's Greatest Food Writer do with tea candles? This is why I am writing to you, Dannis Ree, to ask: what could you do with tea candles?
Tammy