Hello, clowns!
Earlier this week I experimented to see whether or not very small puffy Cheetos would make for good breakfast cereal. In short, the answer was yes, in a fucked up sort of way. Mostly if your blood pressure allows for that kind of sodium intake, in which case, bless you for being the first of the next generation of X-Men. May a whole Marvel universe be created in your honor.
The most interesting thing about that experiment was how puffy Cheetos can stay crunchy in milk for so long. Who the hell knew? Maybe we should fry all of our cereal! Mmm…fried cereal.
I still had those cans of Doritos Minis laying around, however, and I challenged myself to do something even more interesting with them.
Eating the Doritos with milk was one thing, but I knew I was capable of doing better. Could I, Dannis Ree, the greatest food writer in all of history, transform Doritos into groundbreaking cuisine?
As I mulled this question over deeply within my mullhole, I could not stop thinking of breakfast, considering my earlier experiment this week. But just what kind of breakfast dish involves corn as its main ingredient? After all, Doritos are mainly made out of it. I could make Doritos chilaquiles with some salsa and eggs, but that sounded too easy. And then I had it.
I could cook the Doritos down, and turn them into grits.
Hello, my name is Dannis Ree, and I humbly accept all the awards you can possibly chuck at my massive genius skull.
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