The Dippin' Dot egg salad sandwich

frozen egg salad? what did you say?

Oi, clowns!

How’s it going, everyone? I have diarrhea today. Last week I promised that I would make some more Dippin’ Dots using the kit I got from the store, and today, I’m making good on my threa—I mean, uh, promises.

After my abject failure with the toothpaste and orange juice version, I felt sad, deep inside my sad hole. This is why I am continuing the good fight by making a different version, suggested by a friend of mine, Jonathan Surratt. Jon has a great sandwich blog called Bounded by Buns, which I highly recommend you check out, if you’re a big fan of handheld food. It has real recipes in it, ones that won’t poison you.

Jon joked that I should make egg salad Dippin’ Dots.

Because I am a culinary criminal (or I do not understand jokes), I thought that was a fantastic idea. Imagine being a child, going to the movie theater, pointing at what looks like a really delicious ice cream novelty treat, and getting a mouthful of frozen egg salad spheres. That is the kind of backstory that spawns supervillains, or more likely, what created bumbling former White House press secretary Sean Spicer.

I scream, you scream, we all scream for egg salad Dippin’ Dots!!!

Especially you, Spicer, you assclown. You’re getting extra.