Hi, clowns!
Earlier this week I experimented with a very interesting recipe for homemade Pop Rocks, except in typical Dannis fashion, I made a pretty gnarly version. I flavored them with McCormick’s sloppy Joe seasoning, which, I later discovered, many people actually seem to despise (check out the ratings, it’s hilarious).
Turns out, the combination between sugar, corn syrup, citric acid, baking soda, and McCormick sloppy Joe seasoning is a perfect way to recreate the aftertaste of puke in your mouth. Unbelievable. Out of all the dumb shit I’ve done for the newsletter, never in my wildest dreams did I think I’d recreate a bile and partially digested food flavor, completely by accident.
McCormick, please hire me. I have a great idea for a vomit-flavored sprinkle you can add to your food, and I guarantee I can achieve the lowest rating you’ve ever received on any of your products in all of history.
Now that I had a handle on making Pop Rocks, I figured I’d experiment with a different savory flavor, one that’s near and dear to all Chicagoans’ hearts: Italian beef.
Keep reading with a 7-day free trial
Subscribe to Food is Stupid to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.